How you doin?

I’ve had eight counseling sessions, and I would like to share what I’ve learned.

Angrily blowing up when when something little goes wrong is usually a secondary emotion to stress or sadness.

Months of isolation have made it more important than ever to check in with one another.

If anger or resentment is felt, it is possible that “big” response belongs elsewhere; may be a reflection of something deeper (a side benefit of this outlook is it can make it easier to deal with the situation at hand).

A traumatic event can freeze/fragment/fracture time in a way that does not allow access to logic and reason as we know it; “okay-ness,” like spring after winter, eventually does blossom.

One ought to notice stress being alleviated, as there is a lot of inertia in physical stress; in “anchoring” oneself, one is less likely to be pushed around by stressors.

When the nervous system goes into fight or flight mode if affects physiology.

Make space for frustration, anger, confusion, and powerlessness; it takes too much strength to hold those all back.

Don’t let yourself be pushed or pulled around by negative energy.

It’s okay to be mad, sad, proud… all are working together as a team to make you someone different and special.

If you get “keyed up,” notice it with less “efforting: “any extra thing is a threat, and you have enough safety.

Learn capacity and tolerance.

Give space and grace.

If you feel overstretched, give yourself or someone else a hug.